I'm trying to be strong.. So strong that no one can see that there's something wrong with me. Somehow, things don't go the way i want so, and surely, I'm not good in controlling my emotion.. I have to admit, I'm just simply too emotional, and I'm serious on everything. It's tired, so so tired... I need a shoulder, or just simply a hug.

Something that I don't understand, what makes everyone thought that I actually have a boyfriend? Quite a number of people said that from the first sight they saw me.. Fine, I'm not in relationship with anyone. Talking about love is just something too far for me, I'm not going to explain that, you can ask me personally if you want.

Cry? Yes or No? Maybe I cry in my dream.. It's ok to cry right? I feel better after that, since I'm not going to voice it out, that's the only way I could express things.. I'm just making myself tired enough so that I don't have such time to think so much. It's still a smart choice that I don't quit my job at this moment, but.. Hey guys, I'm sorry for my weird emotion, how am I suppose to voice out what was in my mind? I'm sure you won't get what I meant.. 

I'm not strong enough for the previous week, I cry like hell, and I couldn't find anyone that I could rely on. I'm really those think too much type of people.. And I know, I have to really be strong, I shouldn't make people around me to worry that much. I feel so sorry for that.. I'm not mature enough till the way I want, but I'm trying my best to be more mature, I knew I'm not little girl anymore..

I have all sort kind of feelings, heavy hearted to leave, and I couldn't believe time pass by that fast, it's always faster than what i thought. I'm not sure whether my mom and dad gonna sent me over to KL, that will be fine for me. I have a mission for myself, I MUST NOT cry or drop tears in front of them when leaving, that's the way I could make them feel that I'm good enough to handle things myself.

I'm stupid I guess, I'm asking people don't worry about me, but my face shows that I'm seriously not OK at all.. Btw, just give me some time, I promise that a big smile will be back very soon. There's things that I hope would just remain the same, but i know it's impossible, just let it be. Thanks to everyone which trying to cheer me up.

It's holiday for me tomorrow, will really have to rest well.. Hope that things will be fine, say NO to mood swings!

And to dear Geraldine,

Things gonna be fine very soon gal, I know how's your feelings and what's in your mind this moment. The same thing just happen to me, it's ok to cry, just express in the way you want. I'm keep telling myself not to think that much, you too... *hugs* Take care yourself so that people won't worry about you, be strong yea..