Hey there! Life has been truly great too me. Giving me so much great people and most importantly those great memories. Honestly, this trip back is all about unexpectation. All I have in my mind previously was just getting a good rest and be back to the tough life again. But I had such a sweet dream. Omg! Like seriously, thanks guys! I think I'm lucky to have all of you.

13 years of friendship and yet it will always go on as I know. From primary school where I'm just a tiny monitor up till today which I'm already an Enrolled Nurse. I probably don't look like one, more to a crazy nurse thoughXD Things never changed, it's just that we all grew up. Everyone is getting engaged with a busy yet different life. It wasn't that simple as it used to be.

I was supposed to return to Adelaide on the 17Oct but ended up postponing it for another 2 weeks. I would have missed out some amazing moments if everything was settled on time. I know I was gonna miss Curry... Tom Yum... and Mushroom!XD Not the food, but the people. I couldn't recall all of those ridiculous stories. But, there's lots of fun! From how we got ourself a name based on the food, to how we use that in our daily life=D From the stories of ah piao, to ham sap beh beh!

Those 2 weeks was probably moments where I laughed the most. Hoepfully it's not the quota of the year yet! There's just no worries being together with you all. All we enjoy was being able to spent those time together and just LAUGH! I wish I could celebrate my birthday with you guys this year, but it doesn't seems possible. I wonder how would my 20th birthday gonna be like? All I know was, hey.. I'm getting old!

Hahaha=) And I was gonna be celebrating new year all by myself. That seems pretty lonely aye? It's okay, be strong Michelle! Life is tough, but I gotta go on. Even I'm just by myself, I'll have to get it through. It's like another week away from return to where I belong. It's time to get myself back on track aye? I'm kinda sad, and probably kind of insane right at the moment. Just hope that the feeling of homesick won't kill me later on. Cheers!

I have no freaking idea what's in my mind right at this moment. But this drawing just came out with such a phrase. I reckon that's probably something that was moving around in my mind. "World seems small, but we're right opposite on the globe."

All of a sudden, I have this strong feeling of going to beach. I must have gone insane somehow. I wish I'll use my mind to get what I want instead of letting my mind to do what mind wants.

There's so much wish where I hope it'll come true. But being truly honest, none of them seems to be possible. There's so much things bothering me at the moment. I know what to do=D I really do! It's about time to get myself back on track.

There's so much things that I should really think about it. It's time to get back to healthy lifestyle, it's time to get back to study, and it's time to be a workaholic again. I'm not really a workaholic, but that's what it is trying to get along with reality.

I'm afraid of losing? YES! Definitely! Not everything will leave me alone, but not everything will stay either. Sometimes, I hate being a sagittarius.. I hate thinking too much and keeping it to myself. When I question myself, I'm probably afraid of having to face stressful moments and tough life on my own. I probably seems pretty tough, but you never know, how much tears was needed to be able to stand on my feet. But I never give up, even though sometimes it was out of my expectation.

Nothing ever seems to be easy to me. At least it never happens in my life up till now.

I don't know what to say and I have no clue how much time do I need. But it's so hard to have faith and believe once again. It's difficult getting to hold something on your hand, but it's even tougher having to let go.

It's too hard to describe how is it like getting into such a situation. Dilemma? I'm feeling so lucky to own everything I have at the moment. Everyone has been treating me in such a nice way. It wasn't that it's only a single person but everyone did! Somehow I wish it wasn't true.. I'm putting myself in such a situation that I don't know what to do being care by everyone. The more care I've got from everyone, the feeling of insecure gets stronger. I'm so afraid that things will come to an end and I have to go own by myself again.

This is too cruel! I know it's impossible to keep things forever. But.. Is there a way to keep part of it? Life goes on and I have to move forward. Can I keep something with me for this upcoming journey? It's so hard to keep going, and I'm afraid of what's coming up.

This is reality! Telling me to wake up when the dream is coming to an end.

如果世上发生的每件事都有原因，那我好想知道，这一切到底意味着什么？不要让我如此的幸福，因为我好害怕失去的感觉，我没有想像中的坚强...

有人说，拥有就是失去的开始？也许吧...我只是知道，有很多事情，我搞不懂，也不希望结局会是我想像的那样。你说，相信缘分，是你的就是你的，如果注定不是你的，那就会流失，变成有缘无份。我相信缘分，但如果没有把握，就算是上天安排的缘分，也一样有始无终。人是会随着时间而改变的，就算是承诺了，也没有人能够确保，这一切不会改变，没有谁会为了谁而放弃生活。这个世界，让我看清了好多现实的面孔，虽然我并不想接受！

我觉得自己好幸福，幸福得让我好难过，为什么让我拥有那么多，却又是如此的短暂？这一切很美好，但为何无法一直拥有？

Hey guys! It seems like I've been away for quite a while. Sorry for not updating this blog, I'm pretty sure I'll need ample of time to update what I'm currently up to. Just gotta say, I'm back in Malaysia and in just a few weeks time I'm leaving for Adelaide again. I just can't put my feelings in words, and there's definitely too much to be describe.

In the past few weeks, I spent my time at Penang, Kuala Lumpur and Kuching. Even though it's just less than a week time at Penang, but it was undeniably AWESOME! It was heart stacking having to leave. I've been questioning myself every night before sleep if all of this was just a dream. How I wish it was, I rather believing this is just a dream, than having to realize that it's so painful getting back to reality. Dear God, thanks for giving me so much!

5 days in Penang is probably the most memorable moment in my life. There's things that I couldn't explain, there's moment where I laugh so hard because of those joyful moments. There's moment where I feel like crying seeing those touching moment. There's moment where you can see tears in my eyes, not because I'm feeling sad, but there's someone who understand me from the bottom of the heart, and caring for me like never ever before. Distance are tearing us apart, but you'll always be the special one. I wonder when'll be my next trip back, but I know we'll keep our promise towards achieving our own dream in life. I always hope there's an 'IF' in life, but we all know things would never be the same even there's an 'IF'!

Anyway, Congrats to my dearest Bro and Ai Sin for their sweet wedding! Wish you guys all the best in the future and eternal love. This trip back to Penang was definitely different from my previous trip back. It's only been 2 years since I last went back, and most of the relatives doesn't seems to be able to recognize me. I wonder if there's so much changes in 2 years period? It has been really funny that people seems to recognize me wrongly and with such a ridiculous assumption.

I have no idea what's in my mind at the moment. But, I'm still tired from the 4 months+ of hard work after finishing my Diploma. It's really been tiring coming back this time. I spent most of my time travelling from one place to another. Can't believe that I've catch 6 flight for this trip back, and yet it's not the end.

I know it's impossible, but how I wish I could stay longer in where I am now.